To My Baby Girl

I had a dream about you last night, and in it I got to hold you and tell you all the things I'll never get to say to you. I got to tell you how precious you are to God and how much He loves you. I got to tell you how much *I* love you. I got to tell you how sorry I am that when things ended between your dad and me, things ended between you and me too. Your dad and I may not love each other anymore, and I am not your mom, but I spent enough time with you and gave you enough hugs and kisses to be in love with you for the rest of my life.

I want you to know that I love both you and your brother very much - I love you the same - but you my darling have a special place in my heart that will always be yours and nobody elses. I regret that I will not be able to hold you again but I know that I gave you all I could give in our time together.

In my dream I got to tell you that I will always be here for you if you ever need anything, and sweetheart, I know you are too young to understand but I hope you know that is true today and always.

I struggle knowing that you probably wonder where I am and why I left and I pray all the time that you never think you had any part in that. Whatever happened was all between myself and your dad.

You are the funniest, prettiest, smartest little girl I've ever known and you made every day with you brighter. I know that it is not my place to worry about you or your future (although, I do) because God has beautiful things ahead of you. You will see one day.

Baby girl, my heart was broken this morning after my dream. In my dreams I get to say everything I want you to know. In my dreams I get to hold you for just a little longer. I get to let you know that someone in this world is on your side. I know you'll never read this honey, but it's all for you. I love you forever and ever.